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Sex and speaking about sex in public while drives moralists hysteric and the 'modern'ists to unwarranted regaling in the name of openness. while the former have a pessimistic view of its fall outs, the later just shut out their minds to the forebodings of their fears. The truth lies somewhere between the two. First let us accept that biological change in beings is an inescapable phenomenon and for the rational man who by very nature is inquisitive it throws up more challenges than solutions. when we implicitly accept its importance in continuance of our race, why then is this frigidity towards it? It is simple, our morals dictate us thus. When it comes to the question of morals which we so assiduously teach our children day in and day out by way of examples from our epics and puranas, there are some inconvenient situations we try to avoid, sugar-coat or misinterpret to suit our line of argument. The tragedy is truth is so luminous that it shines through all our laminations. And it always, leaves out the exact opposite impression from what we intended to give. A rational being can not but get to the right, (and perhaps the only) conclusion. We mystify, rationalize or deify the characters and the incidents calling it by some sweet names of 'for the general well being of the world (or the so called LOKA SAMRAKSHANA) for which there will be no takers. This appertains not to one religion, one race or one place. It transcends all. Then what should we do? Shall we leave people to the passions in the name of our inability to come over them? Shall we continue to be primitive even after getting civilized? We should first realize that man is an individual and he has a right to choose his behaviour. Even when we do not accept it is what it is. No amount of restraint or shackles can restrain him. He is born free and wild...and continues to be free and wild. What we can attempt is allowing him the freedom he enjoys, we can tame, culture or domesticate his wildness. Then how to do it? Sex is a biological urge for all beings that have come of age. (Of course, some parapsychologists have said it manifests even in childhood and that is beside our point) Civilization is nothing but taming our wildness of behaviour. It is a conscious urge to live in an orderly way which is in itself a constraint. All civilizations are very particular about protecting themselves, their ways and their assumed purity of race. It is this urge that prompted Plato to ban poets from his cities because poets tell lies about Gods and eulogize their immoral behaviour. Plato is the champion of moral behaviour for all citizens and is far sighted about. Living in this age we may, perhaps, condemn his views as extreme. But his intention is to make good, cultured responsible citizens and rulers of those city states. Who can deny that. That is the need of the as well. We can not by any stretch of imagination think that we are more good, cultured and responsible citizens than Athenians of Plato's time and so we can discard his prescriptions as out-dated. They hold water even now. Perhaps they are even more relevant in this troubled times. His opinion springs from his study of human behaviour, wars raised just for the sake a woman, generations wiped out for a single obsession, infatuation or fancy of a king or a lord. (Our Mahabharata is just but a consequence of such infatuation of Duryodhana and Karna for Draupadi.) They are touched by the genocide, orphaning of children, decimation of youth and merciless massacre all around. As an intellectual he reacted positively to his responsibility in identifying the root cause of that and made prescriptions. We should not lose sight of the fact that it was poetry that danced on the lips of commoners by song, it was legend and story that lived on the lips of uneducated. He knew the power of song. He knew the power of poetry. He knew the power of a good poet. That is why he banned only those that sing in praise of their immorals and eulogize their actions. He knew what a role model should be. Just compare the present times on the same lines. Whom we do praise? Give focus and publicity on all media? Whom do we circulate as currency, good or fake? Getting popular is a second-rate urge. Yet, it is an urge nevertheless. People try to satisfy this urge in one way or the other (whichever is easier). So the moral value of sex can not be lost sight of. But, here we differ from him. Most of us are living in democratic countries and not autocratic countries. Even where there is monarchy it is only an apparition of what it was earlier. Civilization need not be imposed on us and we can by choice be ruly and orderly and civilized if only we make an honest attempt. This is just what I want to say. We can speak about sex freely to educate children. We can just kill the unwarranted enthusiasm in the growing minds by just giving it a casual approach and in a most academic way. We can tell them the virtues of chastity. Without taking sides, we should condemn the characters however popular they are otherwise, however dear they might be to us. We should in essence tell them that the great characters were human beings first and elevated themselves to higher planes in spite of the common deficiencies. We should highlight their greatness where it lies and not by playing down their weakness. we should stress that a simple being with a host of weaknesses can still become greater if they imbibe their virtues and try to leave out their weaknesses. Having said this, I would like to emphasise, we should empathize if an adolescent indulges in premarital sex. It is not a blemish of the youth. It is of the parents. Condemn the cause. Behaviour is a matter of personal choice. Are we not entitled to use our limbs and organs the way we want? Civilizing lies in how best we teach them to use it. That's all. |
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