Karthik Narayan (India, 19/02/07)

The recital of the Bhagavad Gita was going on in the television channels. Krishna is on the dias, addressing his elite crowd – America and the rest of the world (Where on earth is that?)

The Pandavas (read American citizens) were constantly irked and hassled by their evil cousins the Kauravas (read terrorist, in American terms, Asia and the Middle East).

Slowly but surely the Pandavas rose with the help of that great “avatar”/ reincarnation of the Saviour, Lord Krishna (George Bush).

The Kauravas tried to blast the towers of the Pandavas. The Pandavas slowly bid for time and planned their action plan.

The Pandavas started making allies – they went to various countries with weak administration and fear in their minds (read India for one example). Naturally, Krishna was always the smart cookie – he gave ruthlessly sadistic ideas to make sure the enemies were killed.

With so many terrorist attacks on them, finally the Pandavas decided to seek revenge. On the battlefield however, they were a bit worried that they were killing their own human race. However, that great lord of Lords, Krishna soothed their minds.

He set forth the “WMD Gita” before them and showed them all his great powers. He would remove injustice and evil from the face of the world. He saw the foreboding omens as he was the see all.

It was the time for the biggest battles. Having vanquished terrorists like Jarasandha (Osama Bin Laden), it was time for Krishna to face the demon who had been tormenting them for a long time – Duryodhana (Saddam Hussein).

People like Manmohan Singh, Tony Blair were petrified. They come to the Great Lord to seek his blessings and advice.

Krishna (Bush) said, “The grief is for those who should not be grieved over. The wise sorrow not for the living, nor for the dead”

“Selfish action is inferior by far to the wisdom of Yoga, therefore seek the shelter of wisdom. How wretched are those whose motive is reward.” (Measure my wretchedness now? But how will u do it when I have still things to do. Wait till I am done)

“Anger and passion are the root of delusion, from delusion comes loss of memory, from there the loss of intelligence to discriminate, and thus he perishes.” (Now you know where all my memory went off to and how I became this way, I have both anger and passion to kill humans)

Krishna continues: “To protect the good, to destroy the evil, to firmly establish Dharma/ righteousness, I come into being from age to age.”

“My birth and activities are divine. He who truly knows and recognizes this is freed from the shackles of rebirth and comes in the End to me.” (No prizes for guessing what Blair and Manmohan Singh are doing)

“For it is my path that many follow.” (yeah right)

“Greater than any material sacrifices is the sacrifice born of Knowledge” (I sacrificed it totally to become a bungling idiot).

“Behold me! In the hundreds and thousands of my forearms and forms, in different manifestations of various colors and shapes.” (Cant you see the American army behind me? I am king of the world, yahoo)

“You would need special eyes to see me in my divine form.” (I will give you divine sight – a sight into the future totally destroyed by my actions. Mankind struggling for food and water and the world blissfully in peace with mass destruction)

“I seek to find and destroy WMD. In order to do that the only counter attack is WMD – wicked means of destruction.”

“Go seek thy enemies and rout them, for its your karma in this world. That is your right to fight for justice.”

THUS ENDS THE FIRST PART OF THE BUSH PARVATA OF THE BUSHAWAT GITA. FOR MORE, TUNE IN TO THE NEXT EPISODE, WHERE BUSH GIVES HIS GYAN AFTER THE VANQUISHING SADDAM, THE BADDIE.